Bullying of any kind is unacceptable at Forest Hills Swim Club (the “Club”) and will not be tolerated. Bullying is counterproductive to team spirit and can be devastating to a victim. The Club is committed to providing a safe, caring and friendly environment for all of our members. If bullying does occur, the Club’s members and guests should know that incidents will be dealt with promptly and effectively. Anyone who knows that bullying is happening is expected to report it.
Objectives of the Club’s Bullying Policy and Action Plan:
WHAT IS BULLYING?
Generally, bullying is the use of aggression, whether intentional or not, which hurts another person. Bullying results in pain and distress.
Bullying is the severe or repeated use, regardless of when or where it may occur, by FHSC members of an oral, written, electronic or technological expression, image, sound, data or intelligence of any nature (regardless of the method of transmission) , or a physical act or gesture , or any combination thereof, directed at any other member or Participating Non-Member that to a reasonably objective person has the effect of causing physical or emotional harm to the other member or damage to the other member’s property;
i. Placing the other member in reasonable fear of harm to himself/herself or of damage to his/her property;
ii. Creating a hostile environment for the other member
iii. Infringing on the rights of the other member; or
iv. Materially and substantially disrupting the training process or the orderly operation of any activity.
An member who feels that he or she has been bullied is asked to do one or more of the following things:
· Talk to your parents (if applicable);
· Talk to a Member of Staff or Board of Directors
· Write a letter or email to the Club Coach, Board Member, or other designated individual;
· In all instances, the board requests that an incident is reported via email to firstname.lastname@example.org
There is no express time limit for initiating a complaint under this procedure, but every effort should be made to bring the complaint to the attention of the appropriate club leadership as soon as possible to make sure that memories are fresh and behavior can be accurately recalled and the bullying behavior can be stopped as soon as possible.
HOW WE HANDLE BULLYING
If bullying is occurring during team-related activities, we STOP BULLYING ON THE SPOT using the following steps:
1. Intervene immediately. It is okay to get another adult to help.
2. Separate the members involved.
3. Make sure everyone is safe.
4. Meet any immediate medical or mental health needs.
5. Stay calm. Reassure the members involved, including bystanders.
6. Model respectful behavior when you intervene.
If bullying is occurring at our club or it is reported to be occurring at our club, we address the bullying by FINDING OUT WHAT HAPPENED and SUPPORTING THE MEMBERS INVOLVED using the following approach:
FINDING OUT WHAT HAPPENED
1. First, we get the facts.
a. Keep all the involved parties separate.
b. Get the story from several sources.
c. Listen without blaming.
d. Don’t call the act “bullying” while you are trying to understand what happened.
e. It may be difficult to get the whole story, especially if multiple members are involved or the bullying involves social bullying or cyber bullying. Collect all available information.
2. Then, we determine if it's bullying. There are many behaviors that look like bullying but require different approaches. It is important to determine whether the situation is bullying or something else.
a. Review the definition of bullying;
b. To determine if the behavior is bullying or something else, consider the following questions:
c. Remember that it may not matter “who started it.” Some members who are bullied may be seen as annoying or provoking, but this does not excuse the bullying behavior.
d. Once you have determined if the situation is bullying, support all of the members involved.
SUPPORTING THE MEMBER INVOLVED
3. Support the members who are being bullied
a. Listen and focus on the member. Learn what’s been going on and show you want to help. Assure the member that bullying is not their fault.
b. Work together to resolve the situation and protect the bullied member. The member, parents (if applicable), and fellow team members and coaches may all have valuable input. It may help to:
i. Ask the member being bullied what can be done to make him or her feel safe. Remember that changes to routine should be minimized. He or she is not at fault and should not be singled out. For example, consider rearranging lane assignments for everyone. If bigger moves are necessary, such as switching practice groups, the member who is bullied should not be forced to change.
ii. Develop a game plan. Maintain open communication between the Club and member. Discuss the steps that will be taken and how bullying will be addressed going forward.
c. Be persistent. Bullying may not end overnight. Commit to making it stop and consistently support the bullied member.
4. Address bullying behavior
a. Make sure the member knows what the problem behavior is. Young people who bully must learn their behavior is wrong and harms others.
b. Show member that bullying is taken seriously. Calmly tell the member that bullying will not be tolerated. Model respectful behavior when addressing the problem.
c. Work with the member to understand some of the reasons he or she bullied. For example:
i. Sometimes people bully to fit in or just to make fun of someone is a little different from them. In other words, there may be some insecurity involved.
ii. Other times people act out because something else—issues at home, abuse, stress—is going on in their lives. They also may have been bullied. These members may be in need of additional support.
d. Involve the member who bullied in making amends or repairing the situation. The goal is to help them see how their actions affect others. For example, the member can:
i. Write a letter apologizing to the athlete who was bullied.
ii. Do a good deed for the person who was bullied, for the Club, or for others in your community.
iii. Clean up, repair, or pay for any property they damaged.
e. Avoid strategies that don’t work or have negative consequences:
i. Zero tolerance or “three strikes, you’re out” strategies don’t work. Suspending or removing the member does not reduce bullying behavior. Members may be less likely to report and address bullying if suspension or getting kicked off the team is the consequence.
ii. Conflict resolution and peer mediation don’t work for bullying. Bullying is not a conflict between people of equal power who share equal blame. Facing those who have bullied may further upset people who have been bullied.
f. Follow-up. After the bullying issue is resolved, continue finding ways to help the person who bullied to understand how what they do affects other people. For example, praise acts of kindness or talk about what it means to be a good teammate.
5. Support bystanders who witness bullying. Every day, people witness bullying. They want to help, but don’t know how. Fortunately, there are a few simple, safe ways that athletes can help stop bullying when they see it happening.
a. Be a friend to the person being bullied;
b. Tell a trusted adult – your parent, coach, or club board member;
c. Help the member being bullied get away from the situation. Create a distraction, focus the attention on something else, or offer a way for the target to get out of the situation. “Let’s go, practice is about to start.”
d. Set a good example by not bullying others.
e. Don’t give the bully an audience. Bullies are encouraged by the attention they get from bystanders. If you do nothing else, just walk away.